I Miss Home, Even Though I've Never Been There

I'm in one of those phases where I want to go home. On both levels. I would like to just go home and paint, and repair, and build. I'm a bit tired of ministry right now, and would enjoy an extended time away to just be at my house, in my barn, quietly working. Not sure why. Guess I need to spend some time on that one. That's probably the issue. I'm not really spending time contemplating much right now. I'm in a constant phase of preparation for my next event. My next sermon, lesson, worship night, college class, small group, youth group, game night, event, etc. No rhythm, just run. I don't handle that well.

The other sense of home that I have echoes this. I want to go home, to be free of the cares of this world and with my Dad. No, no it's not a hidden suicide thing. I just want to be with God in a way that is different than right now. I want to be face to face, no distractions, just swallowed up in His presence, love, kindness, grace, hope, joy, peace, and passion.

Usually when I feel like this, it's a gauge telling me I'm running on empty from doing too much. Yep, it's that time again. I'm realizing it as I'm writing it. I need to step away. Okay. I've been at this long enough to not fight it. I'll step away this week. I'll talk to my supervisor and schedule some time away.

Good, I feel better already. What about you? Are you ready to go home? Is it time for a break as well?

Head Down, Heart Towards Heaven

I'm feeling the pinch today. Too much to do and not enough time to get it all done. Procrastination is a small part of it. Overcommitment is another much bigger piece. It's one of those weeks where work demands that are out of my control are crashing into work demands that I simply must get done. So, I kick into slow mode and avoid it all. As soon as I finish this, I'm going to have to put my head down and work hard.

It's always been this way, you know. Ever since we were kicked out of the garden for our stupid choice to run things ourselves, it's been like this. We can invent all of the amazing technology we want, it will always be this way. It's the cost of doing things our own way.

So, I'm going to try to push towards God today and listen even more for His promptings. Its too easy to ignore Him when I get overwhelmed and buried. Today, I'm choosing to walk in the other direction. I'm going to work as hard and as fast as I can, but I'm going to keep my heart listening for His guidance.

It can only help.